5 QUESTIONS FOR NICHY (GRAVITY CONTROLLER, TELEPATH, AND EMOTIONAL ENERGY COACH FOR INDIE POP ARTIST EREL PILO)
HELLO! Because of such socially awkward times, this week's interview was facilitated through the generosity of a highly-favored feline in Erel Pilo's life. Please delve further into the world of P!LOT by enjoying this new music video, which was released on International Cat Day (8 / 8 / 2020). Each question was answered in a very delicate code of sorts.
What kind of genre does P!LOT exist in and how does that resonate with your particular species?
No offense, but human music really doesn’t do much for me. I generally excuse myself whenever my personal assistant, Erel turns some on. Her band, P!lot, is in the indie genre — her words, not mine. I recall she was listening to 60’s French Pop as she worked on her latest song. But it’s really all the same to me. The only human band I make an exception for is Cibo Matto.
If you had an hour of network tv time once a day, what would your show be called?
The Internet is where it’s at (it’s actually run by an uncle of mine), but I do love a good nature show. Mine would be called “All Around the Neighborhood” and it would feature scenic views visited by hopping birds, foraging squirrels and funny rabbits. It would also feature the soothing sounds of streams and brooks, or even water traveling through the pipes in a house.
I have another idea for a TV special. I would go undercover and do an exposé to find out where those darty red, lit up dots come from, “Lazers," I believe you call them, and whether any cat has been able to catch one. It’s one of the great mysteries in the catdom.
How many years have you known Erel Pilo and would you recommend this person for a position as a pet care activist?
Erel and I met about 9 years ago at the shelter in Teterboro, NJ. She had pretty good skills at manipulating her fingers to imitate prey, and that’s what broke the ice. She took me home that day. It was love at first sight.
I don’t believe pet care needs activists because we are so lovable to begin with, but yes, I would recommend her for this position.
Are you especially excited about International Cat Day since so many people have more time to spend with furry companions?
For me, every day is Cat Day, because I understand the importance our species carries in the interconnectedness of all things. However, it is a special day for humans to honor us, and it is helpful to humans that they have more time to devote to us. Many furry friends are helping their human assistants to get through this difficult time.
What are some goals you have set for yourself before the year is over?
I currently work as a gravity controller. My job entails that I check whether gravity is still working at various locations by going to the edge of a table or countertop, and pushing whatever object happens to be there, say a tissue box or a pair of sunglasses, over the edge. If the object falls to the floor, that means gravity is functioning properly and I’ve done my job. Can you imagine a world without gravity?! It would be a disaster. That’s why I’m on call 24/7. I hope to continue to excel at my job.
Besides this, I spend most of my time meditating on the true nature of reality. This requires a lot of time. Last year, I mastered telepathy, but I mostly get to use it with other cats. It is frustrating that people have not learned this skill yet, and continue to communicate in words. I’ve learned to say my assistant’s name in English to get her attention, and then I communicate my needs to her with telepathy. She’s not great at it, but she’s learning.
Another goal of mine is to get rid of that scratchy feeling in my right ear.